The Buddha and Bill W. | The Fix

I am sharing this to read later. But Buddhism has helped me with sobriety more than AA. And it has also been helping with ny depression. I quit taking Prozac more than a month ago and doing okay so far. I have read most of the Kevin Griffin  books. I think this is a good perspective for people uncomfortable with the Bible and Christian roots of AA.

Failed at Sober Burn

So I didn’t make it through Burning Man without drinking alcohol this year. In fact, I broke sobriety in Reno. Met up with some French guys for dinner and when they ordered a bottle of wine, I did not decline a glass. But I was glad they were there to share the bottle.

And once at Burning Man,  I remained sober the first few days. But on Wednesday I had a volunteer shift that required me to socialize and be outgoing. I asked a camp mate for a beer to help lubricate my personality. It was a weak move. And I drank more the rest of the day. And a little each day. I got tipsy but not extremely drunk. And no blackouts or stupid acts. I started to think maybe I will just reset my sobriety clock after each burn.

I am not fooling myself into thinking I am no longer an alcoholic.  I know I am. As soon as I left Reno, I vowed to return to my abstinence lifestyle.  But I also want to stop focusing on numbers. Focusing on how many months or years I refrained from drinking. Stop focusing on the higher the number, the better of a person I am.  Stop feeling guilty for not keeping my sober streaks lasting longer.

I am also thinking of attending SMART meetings. Maybe I can stick to that program better than AA.